The losing Compassion and Empathy...

Image Source:- lonelyplanet.com

Sometimes you do something and immediately after that realize the mistake. But by the time you realize it, you also realize that you can hardly do anything about that. So a sense of guilt encompasses you, a guilt which you can't do anything about! 

Today while coming back to my flat, a poor couple on road, with a kid in the arms of mother, stopped me and pleaded for money. This is fairly common scene in Hyderabad, and I immediately ignore and brush past such people. But this time, the guy called back saying he doesn't want money, even food will be great. I had almost moved ahead, when I recalled that my this month's quota of helping people in need was still pending. So like a shrewd businessman I smelled an opportunity there- an opportunity to fulfill my monthly resolution, an opportunity to get some instant gratification. I turned back, told the guy to come with me and I will buy them Dinner. I signaled them to cross the road with me to the other side, where I knew an affordable restaurant. I went there asked the person on reception, to pack a dinner for two. I paid for that, took the packed food, and handed it over to the guy standing outside the restaurant. That's where I did what I immediately felt guilty about.  While handing over the food packet to the guy, I showed great hurry for leaving, didn't even look towards the guy, and quickly instructed him to move away from the place (so that he doesn't cause trouble to the restaurant owner). All this while he was politely thanking me for the food!! The moment I moved away from them doing all this, I realized my mistake! I realized my mechanical nature, my inhumane approach towards the family, my selfish nature to fulfill my resolution without caring for the intent. But the moment had passed, there was no going back, I could hardly do anything about that. I was in hurry to reach my flat, but once I decided to buy them food, I should have done that with a sense of empathy. That empathy was missing, that humane nature was missing. I did that as if I was doing a favor to the family, with no emotions, no humane connection with the family! Particularly, the hurry shown while leaving them, put myself to shame. I might have helped the family, but the intention of helping was missing. I immediately felt a pang of guilt, which I felt so helpless about. I just promised to myself to do better now onwards... 

The incident made me think, why have we become so mechanical and so self-centered in our life? We are we always in so much of hurry, that we forget there are other humans around, some of whom may need our compassion and empathy, much more than anything else! Money seems such an easy way out. Spend some money and suppress the need of helping with compassion! Where are we headed! Life seems moving so fast that we don't even want to stop think about the pain and suffering of others....

Life...

There is more to life than what meets the eyes... The roses, the flowers, the children, the friends, aren't these the beauty of life? We just need to try and look beyond our vision, and realise, that there is more to life than what greets our eyes...

Making friends, going out around new places, witnessing the miracles of nature, aren't these the joy of life? We just need to feel life in it's real sense, and realise, that Life is more than what we had ever thought it to be.

If only we could feel the innocence of kids, if only we could feel the beauty of nature, the wonderful relationships, the magical love... If only we could feel... then we could realise how Life is much more than what we actually take it to be.

Life is not just an existence, it's an experience, it's a journey with lots of wonderful experiences. If only we could feel life fully, we could realise how much more it is than it looks to be.

Life is an experience not worth giving a miss. Life is beautiful, wonderful, life is much more than what meets our eyes...

Relationships

Relationships are mysterious things.... Sometimes I start wondering why do we even need it. Why can't we be happy without it. Why do we always need a relationship to keep us happy. It's like our happiness lies in relationships. It's like someone else drives our life. :/

We are always in search of someone(well, if not always, most of the times, for one reason or the other.) The search may not actually be intentional and directed, but our emotional state of mind is such that, it always wants to connect to someone. That's where I start wondering as to why can't we be content with ourselves! Ohh, it may look weird for sure, for being happy with our own self would surely be quite a insane looking idea. But then as Osho says-

"Aloneness is beautiful. It has an elegance around it, a grace, a climate of tremendous satisfaction.   Aloneness is SHEER independence. One feels as if one is one's whole world, one's whole existence...."

Does it sound weird? :)

Well anyway, I was wondering how we keep going through a cycle of varying relationships and the accompanying emotional states.  It seems so fascinating if you look at it from a distance. We always seem to be in an emotional-crisis-state, always looking out for some emotional solace from others! If we don't get someone, we get disheartened, and if we do get, then it gets so lively! Curious thing is that it always keeps going in a perpetual motion, never-ending cycle.

One thing that is quite worrying, is the discontentment caused by relationships (or desire of it?). It always takes us through such a roller-coaster kind of emotional ride. Sometimes we get enlivened up after interacting with someone, and sometimes we may even go in an emotional black hole! Relationships affect our lives to such a great extent that it virtually controls our happiness. We get happiness from relationships. A good relationship can be a great source of happiness for us. Being with that someone special can bring immense joy in our life. Relationships are always such a precious thing to cherish.

But then relationships cause emotional pains too. Not being able to be with someone, not being able to get close to someone.... these can cause great discontent and loneliness. We have our desires, our choices, our aspirations, and we get disheartened if we are not able to get into the desired relationships. It seems so worrying how much discontent these issues can cause.  And there seem no way out to address this problem (is it really a problem?).

Are relationships the problem, or are our desires the problem? I am still wondering.....

Corporate Life

Corporate life is strange.  It gives no time to think. You are always chasing one goal after another. This is good as well as bad. There is always a challenging goal ahead, which keeps you moving on in your life. It keeps you energetic, on-the-move, always busy, always chasing an adrenaline-pumping, nerve wrecking target. At the end of each individual target, one feels triumphant. Each target achieved gives a reason to celebrate, a new boost to the life. At the same time, each target achieved also gets followed by a new incoming challenge! You don't get time to think anything other than your own   closed-up world. Corporate life seems to enclose people in a completely different world, away from regular social life. The life seems to be so indulging that you hardly get anytime to be yourself, and explore your hidden abilities. A corporate set up wires your mind in a completely different manner. You are programmed to think, act, and behave in a particular manner. So as I said, it's good and it's bad.

But I think it would be wrong to be critical of it, because even a Public Sector life will have a completely different set up, and so will the armed forces life... It's just that the degree of flexibility offered varies in each of them. One can say that, it's not bad, it's just about the amount of flexibility being offered.

Talking of another aspect, I wonder how much effort an IT professional would  be able to apply towards social causes. Being in a corporate set up, first, one's mind is too absorbed in professional life, to think about doing something for society. Even if one would like to do something, I wonder how much time he would be able to devote :/ That said, good people are everywhere, and I am sure, a motivated person will always find ways to do what he loves doing most.

With this, I end up this post of mine. I think this must be one of the shortest post on my blog. Just got some thoughts in my mind, and felt like penning it down. And yes, since I am quite new to this Corporate world, so my perceptions may be wrong about it! :) Hope to experience it well, and enjoy it thoroughly. :)